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By absolutely leveling 2-Bit during the latest Home Depot Tool Race, Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper should be expecting an invitation to try out for his hometown Atlanta Falcons.
Phil the Bucket may already be The GOAT of The Home Depot Tool Race at Truist Park, but Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper just became a legend after going Jessie “The Hammer” Tuggle on poor, ole 2-Bit.
For those who don’t know, The Home Depot Tool Race is every bit as Atlanta as getting stuck in traffic and lemon pepper wings. Phil the Bucket is every bit as celebrated as Mickey Mouse, while 2-Bit is every bit the wrestling heel of Scott “Razor Ramon” Hall. As for Blooper, he is changing the game with every breath he takes. The Atlanta Falcons need to bring him to Flowery Branch now!
Blooper ear-holing 2-Bit on the Truist Park warning track is sensational mascot-on-mascot crime.
The self-awareness this guy has is next level too, as Blooper understands he will be suspended by the NFL for four games after laying the lumber on ole 2-Bit.
They are cool now, as you can never put a price on going viral, bruh!
Young ATLiens will grow up with posters of this unforgettable tackle on their bedroom walls.
Atlanta Braves mascot Blooper should start at linebacker for the Atlanta Falcons
No doubt about it, this is what undeniable excellence looks like in mascot form. When a set of anthropomorphic tools take your beloved Braves ball cap from you and prance around with it in your house in front of all your friends, you do whatever it takes to get it back. With hits that would make Keith Brooking and the late Tommy Nobis proud, let’s see Blooper do the Dirty Bird, y’all!
Nobody even really knows what Blooper is, but he is an ATLien to his core, 100 percent. If Blooper could talk, he would only utter rhymes constructed by OutKast, Ludacris and Childish Gambino. When he bleeds, he bleeds Chick-fil-A sauce. It was all yellow like that Coldplay song, but clocks were certainly cleaned at the speed of sound with this forearm shiver, as he tried to fix you, 2-Bit!
“The product of science run amok” is everything we did not know that we needed. Blooper has not been here forever, but he is certainly made a name for himself, alright. Just look at him chasing down The GOAT Phil the Bucket to get his hat back. By signing Blooper, the Falcons will be 1.5 wins better in the over/under department in sportsbooks across the land. Go make some money.
Blooper is the hero Atlanta deserves, and even better yet, he is the one Atlanta needs right now.